stelika

YAY ME! ... YAY ME!

I'm not feeling too well. U_u I want to get a job, but I just can't, because I don't feel well enough. But I NEED the money. I'm going to San Francisco for Wondercon in February, but I need $30 for both me and my Dad. My Dad COULD pay for it, but that's rude. Plus, I always hate those spoiled brats who think their parents are made of money. :| My left eye hurts, it feels like I might have a sist or whatever that's called. You know those bubble-ish things on the surface of your eye. My dog has those sometimes. Maybe I caught it from her? Or I must be really, really tired, even though it started hurting not long after I woke up. Oh come on, no

If I hate drawing so much, why do I keep doing it? Well, I don't really HATE it, but I hate the results. It's never cute, correct, fantastic, sexy, good, accurate, great, or awesome AT ALL to me. It's some stupid wannabe. I get this wave of guilt, and I'm not quite sure what I'm guilty of! Guilty of giving art a bad name? Probably. I barely try, and when it's just for fun, I feel like everyone's just giving me the look, like "you're such a poser, you shouldn't be drawing, quit ruining the name of art." And I just want my account to be private or something, where only a select few people can look at my failures, I DON'T DESERVE PEOPLE LIKING